you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
