i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Houston, we have a blender
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
