New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
