tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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