just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
