i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
