chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
