Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
