just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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