Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
