don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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