his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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