You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
