Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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