I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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