Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
