You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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