forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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