I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
