the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
