Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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