Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
