Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
