dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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