So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
