i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
