she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
