ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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