nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Randomize