So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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