He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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