was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
