if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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