I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
