she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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