glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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