What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize
