There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
