omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize