There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
