Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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