I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
