he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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