I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
