No, drunk sperm still make babies.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
