We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
