How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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