marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
