I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize