I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
